This Woman Just Explained the Divorce Glow-Up & Moms Everywhere Are Nodding

There is no denying the glow-up that some women have when they get a divorce. They are embarking on a new chapter in their lives, after all. Some men are guilty of having one as well, to be honest. After a man shared on TikTok that he doesn’t understand why some women have a glow-up after divorce and not during the marriage, when it counts, a woman shared her own video to respond and explain why some women find themselves all over again following a divorce.

In the man’s TikTok, he asks, “Where was that effort when we were married?” in reference to some women “drop a lot of weight and look super sexy” after a divorce. The woman responds to his questions in her video and explains what the post-divorce glow-up really is for some women and moms and what leads them to make improvements on themselves after the marriage has ended rather than during it.

According to the user on TikTok, the divorce glow-up has everything to do with how the husband acted during the marriage.

@twomorayeels #greenscreenvideo it’s simple, you’re robbing her of the mental and physical space to take care of herself by not independently managing your responsibility as a father/household member 🤷🏻‍♀️ #husbandandwife #happywife #fairplay #divisionoflabor #misogyny #modernwomen #domesticlaborisstilllabor #thementalloadofmotherhood #postdivorceglowup ♬ original sound – twomorayeels

She explains in her video that there are “three types of men” who are husband and fathers, or just husbands. According to her, the first type is men who push most or all of the mental and physical load of the relationship, parenting, and home life onto the female partner. The other type is men who “help their wives” but actually only do it in expectation of the wife “returning the favor” for his benefit. With that second type of husband, the creator says, the husband would be less willing to help out with the home or kids if they weren’t guaranteed praise or a reward of sorts from the female partner.

The third type, according to the TikTik creator, is men who share the responsibility of parenting and of things in the home “because they want to and it’s rewarding for them.” As to be expected, the divorce glow-up happens with women who are married to the other types – not this third type of husband.

“Women that glow up after divorce are married to one of the first two types of men,” she says. “And women that glow up in the marriage are married to the third type of man.”

After she shared her point of view, other users commented to agree and applaud the woman for explaining that divorce glow-up to the men who don’t quite get it and who honestly might not even make an effort to understand it.

“They glow up bc of all the extra time they have not taking care of an adult child,” one person commented on the video.

Someone else shared, “It seems obvious to me (married to #3) but if a woman has a ‘glow up’ after divorce it’s because someone was suppressing her glow.”

Another person chimed in that they believe some husbands’ assumptions are that women might glow up for a new partner. But according to the commenter, women are doing it “strictly for themselves.”

To that, the creator of the TikTok replied, “Right. Their problem is assuming women’s bodies/appearance and effort is for them. It’s not.”

The problem with the first two types of husbands she outlined is that neither type is designed to be truly supportive of the wife. And if someone identifies with the first two types, they could be far more likely to be headed for divorce than the third type of partner.